Good afternoon, Smash Academy!

In spite of the chaotic events of this year's graduation, the school and even the rest of the city seems at peace! [He said, jinxing the entire school.] Truly, these carefree, idyllic, lazy days of summer...

[He suddenly points at the camera, his brow furrowing into SERIOUS BUSINESS MODE.]

Should be anything but! Summer break here is too long to waste on doing nothing!!

[Whoops, he has to check himself here. Deep breath, Kiyotaka. He's trying to prove to a certain someone that he's not just a stick in the mud.]

However, while it certainly is important to refresh one's memory when it comes to schoolwork, all of this free time is also a perfect opportunity to have fun and enjoy ourselves! Even I know that one cannot just spend each and every hour cooped up studying.

[But if you listen closely you can hear the tortured screaming of his soul.]

So tell me: what does everybody do for fun at times like these? There's a whole world of hobbies and recreation that I have yet to experience, but I am looking to change that! Let's work together to make the summer enjoyable, shall we?

[A video post pops up on the network with a cellphone-y aspect ratio. The girl in charge of the camera has it way too close to her face before she pulls it back and starts talking at about a mile a minute.]

Heyyyy, it works! Good, I'm totally starving. Uh... I guess my info's still good cuz I got wi-fi, no problemo, but s'that really the date? I coulda sworn it was last year, like, 5 minutes ago. I was on a plane to Kalos and I walked outta the bathroom and now I'm here? Howzzat work, anyway? I mean, like, I'm stoked to be back and stuff but I tried FOREVER to get back last year'n I couldn't! It was the pits, and...

And I'm stuck. In a... I think it's a closet? Lotsa brooms. I dunno how I even got here but the door won't open and man, I was like 10 minutes away from my in-flight meal. I could eat, like... Somethin' that eats a lot. I hope I don't gotta sleep in here. I tried bustin' the door open but I don't wanna trash it cuz that's gotta be a detention or somethin'. Someone's gotta have a key. Right? ...Right?

Uh, thanks! If you see this and you can help a girl out! Umm... P.S., what's on the menu? If the cafeteria is still in the same place I'm there. Peace out!

[There's nothing quite like being pushed along and having your shrieks be ignored.

'This will be your room,' they said.
'Classes aren't in session right now, but they will be in a few months,' they said.
'Take the time to enjoy the summer and get to know everyone first, they said.

But no one's explained what exactly is going on, where Lord Chrom is, or the other Shepherds. In fact, no one's really explained much of anything that truly makes sense.

She stares at her computer and the video feed, mostly clueless. She doesn't really know how to use anything she's looking at. Finally seating herself, she's still for many moments before her head suddenly turns and there's the audible sound of her chair rapidly scooting across the floor. A mess of limbs flies up and she introduces herself by way of a screech.]

EEK!
Stay back! I'll—I—I have a sword and I know how to use it!

[It could be a bug. A pikmin. It could be nothing at all. The world may never know.]

[Suddenly, a man with a strange seaweed hair style. He looked rather upset, or did he? It was unclear. Because at some degree, Garry was happy about being back; but there was a very big confusion. Garry could've sworn this place seemed far more different than when he last left. Then he saw the calendar, and well.]

I...I don't believe this! How could so much time have passed since I left! I was only gone for a couple weeks and now this place tells me it's been months??

That makes no sense!! I didn't want to have been gone for so long, now the school year is over!

[He took a moment to then calm himself down. Forgetting that this meant there were those who didn't know him, or hadn't seen him for a while. This made for a great impression/return to the school. Garry had to recover, quick. After all, he wanted to come back to the crazy. People he missed and the teaching he missed, let's not screw this up.]

Anyway-! I'm Garry and I'm your old, er, or new Painting teacher. Nice to meet you all, or see you again. Whichever!

Aaaah, I suppose if anyone still needs me before the school year for anything, let me know!

Oh gosh, I'm so embarrassed.

[ After finally learning how to operate technology on a basic level, a young pale-skinned lady can be seen on video. ]

I hope I'm doing this right... this is all so strange.

If only this were a battle, I know exactly what I'd do. But... no, I must press on. Yes, I should introduce myself first.

[ She clears her throat, it's been a couple of months since she said these words. ]

I am the daughter of Lu Bu. It is my duty to lead everyone to victory!

...O-Oh, no!

[ She realizes that she forgot to press what she thinks is the "record" button and corrects herself, not noticing that the camera has in fact been recording this whole time. ]

--I am the daughter of Lu Bu. It is my duty to lead everyone to victory!

[ Much better! ]

Heyya ladies and germs, looks like the end of the semester's comin' to an end. Finals come and grades go, your truly of course has nothing but excellent grades, mwuahaha! Anyhow, more prom questions I guess, but is the usual routine the same or do I have to bring somethin' to shield myself?

Oh, I almost forgot about somethin'- y'see, one of our resident hardass gave me the opportunity to have freedom expression like, oh I dunno, a radio shows. I don't really know how much you guys tune in buuut just so ya guys know, I'm still accepting submissions.

[What could that possible mean.]

( private to Shantae )

This is probably going to sound ignorant to all of you, but what's prom? I figured I'd ask where somebody who knows for sure could tell me, but I feel like I'm in the dark on all this.

[He gestures with an open palm as he continues to explain what he knows.]

What I've gathered is that it's some sort of event that follows graduation, so I'm thinking it's a tournament of some kind where you pick a sparring partner. If anyone's still looking for someone, I'd be up for it. Just tell me what I need to know.

[AND THERE'S HIS PITCH. HIS ILL-INFORMED PITCH. Somebody help this poor young man.]

[ Vivian had seen the mark on the calendar. 'Mother's Day.' What did it celebrate? Was it a day they made mothers? Who knew! She didn't. But after some research and thinking she understood what a mother was through some 1999 angelfire gif-riddled sites with bad poetry and midi music, Vivian was sure she got the idea.

SO VIDEO. ]

Happy Mother's Day to everyone. [ okay close enough] A mother sounds special. I hope they are all happy today.

I care for my mother very much too. [??????? Well she hopes she got the right idea but ]

Happy Mother's Day, Taka!!

Uhm, when is Father's Day? [ and then she leans in and whispers ] I want to give the Doctor something special.

[Hello dear listeners, or perhaps you have stumbled upon FM 108.45 by accident? Either way, the usual intro chimed like usual, however quickly cut by two alarming beeps.]

( nanana radiooo )

yo real quick announcement

i know we got these bug things all over and normally i wouldn't really give too much of a shit but they've got the stadium controls all kinds of fucked up

on the one hand seeing what happens if i try to use the stadium sounds like it'd be hilarious but i also kinda want to keep my job yknow
i dont wanna be held responsible if the stadium turns off the safety and turns on fucking lava or something while im trying to teach

so combat strategies isnt gonna be happening till this clears up
gonna suggest anyone else who teaches in the here do the same thing but hey thats your call

if you feel like being useful and helping to clear this shit up i'll be here

--

[True to her word, when she has a free moment in her day, Nyx is in the stadium, doing as best she can to keep those shadow bugs out of the more delicate controls. Or, when she can't so much do that, she settles for angrily zapping as many of them as she can find.

Maybe someone really should give her a hand, before she winds up doing more damage than she prevents.]

( blah blah narration stuff )

I understand that there is no excuse for my recent behaviour. I will do everything in my power to make up for any trouble I have caused.

I must also announce that I am no longer a hall monitor or the head of the Disciplinary Committee. This has been the case for several weeks. Do not think that means that you have free reign to cause chaos.

[Yeah, but chaos is gonna happen anyway, AS USUAL.

Anyway, with that done, he lingers in the library for a little while before beginning the trek back to his dorm. He's been dreading going back for the first time since Valentine's Day, but it can't be avoided any longer. Unless he runs into someone else along the way.]

Good evening, students! [Or staff, if they're listening.] How is everybody settling in to the new semester? The days may be cold and short and often bleak, but it's important to start as strong as you finish! That's why I have decided that everybody could benefit from a little motivation.

Here is a little activity for us all to share! Everyone, share a quote or proverb that truly inspires you! Use it to invoke that same passion in others! Together, we'll pull through the dark of winter and emerge victorious into the light of spring! Yes, this is truly a wonderful idea!

[Oh god there's no way he's serious about something this lame. But if you squint, you can see one of his handwritten motivational posters on the wall behind him, which means he is probably dead serious.]

All right, I'll begin! Let's see... An appropriate one for this situation would be...

[AHEM.]

"Fall down seven times, stand up eight."

It means, of course, that no matter what life has to throw at you to knock you down, as long as you do not give in to defeat, you can always get back up and try again! Prove that you are greater than any hardship! At the very end of it all, remain standing strong and proud!

What do you think? Does it spark a little inspiration? Now it's your turn!

[Of course he won't be feeling so passionate when a SPECIAL GUEST STAR makes an appearance later on... Stay tuned. Or don't. HOLD ON I LIED that'll be somewhere else.]

Gooood morning lovely people of Smash, lovely morning we have after new years ain't it?

[Surprisingly, he was out of sight for the whole bar fiasco.]

I mean, 's a lovely morning, winter or no and seems like we're off a good start in the year right. Why, I feel like we might have a good year ahead, especially with such a good start.

Well, y'know, it's a good day and all.

[He's awfully cheery, more than usual if one paid more careful attention.

Then again, he started humming a tune familiar to many. That is, before he got too excited and it turned into a different tune altogether.]

This was Brown's first Christmas in the school. And honestly, even if he had the money for buying presents that costs more than stuff from thrift shops and garage sales, he still had no idea what to get for people.

( Gifts for Nanjo, Shantae, Falcon, Ishimaru, Voile, Hajime, Vivian, Bulba, and Chili )

Hey! Hey, guess what! It's almost Christmas! My second one ever!! Did everybody send their letters to Santa already? What did you ask for? I want my very own easel and a unicorn! I hope I get them!

Umm, ummmm! It's only ten days away! That's a lot of waiting... but... it also gives a lot of time to prepare and make plans. Like, let's plan to stay up late and see Santa and everything! Who wants to do that with me?

[ Koujaku is sitting in the common room, by the look of things, lounging on one of the chairs as he addresses the network, ]

Since it looks like I'm going to be here a while, I figured I should try something. I need a little advice first, if anyone is willing to help me out, [ bonus points if it's a cute girl helping him out, but you know-- ]

Back in Midorijima I was a freelance women's hairdresser, and I was thinking maybe I could open up a shop here as well. I can't let the lovely ladies of the Academy go without proper care, right? [ right. but that's not all! ] I guess I could make an exception for guys as well, since I've seen a couple that could use a little help, [ he grins, ]

So, anyone know a good place to set one up? I'd be more than happy to offer my services now, too until I get the place running. I don't have a roommate just yet and there's plenty of space in the dorm to work for now. [ thankfully, he had had his trusty supplies strapped to his belt like a huge loser when he came here. ]

Ah... I guess I should give everyone my name, huh? I'm Koujaku, it's nice to properly meet you all, and I appreciate any advice you can offer.

[Gordon flicks on the camera, looking generally tired and irritated towards the screen. The scenery behind him reminiscent of Dr. Frankenstein's labs--Or his own, for those who are familiar with it and take his class. In the background, the lights flicker slightly. One of the bulbous silhouettes shift a little--]

Hate to do this, but class tomorrow is canceled due to, ah--

[There's an enormous BZZZAP and a yelp, a white flash, and a crackle of static on the screen. When Gordon returns to the camera, he's in a different location, namely the hallway just OUTSIDE his labs, considerably more ruffled and slightly singed.]

[...was that a cackle audible beyond the wall? No, of course not. Probably just microphone static.]

An uppity Tesla coil. I'd be able to fix it, if the damn thing would stop floating, and no amount of grounding seems to change the fact that it prefers living targets now. If anyone has any insight as to what could be causing it, I'd really... REALLY like to hear it.

[You'd think he'd sound more alarmed at the whole thing, but one gets the impression he was alarmed an hour ago. Now he's just getting pissed off.]

I've already made a few stops to talk to people in person, but I've gotta reach a damn crowd here if I'm to get anything done. If I already caught up with you on this subject, feel free to move on, or let me know if you've got anything else to add.

We all know this place is weird. Just how weird is up in the air, but I can say for certain the weirdest place I've ever seen. We also know that some of us can't get back home. I know it isn't just me, it can't be. If you can't get home from this #@&^% city, let me know, and tell me if you know how you got here in the first place.

Now if you can get home, I want to know how too. If this is your hometown, then you can probably safely ignore this old engineers mad chats.

On a related note, I'm looking for someone with access to a rocket ship, or space pod, or what ever. That, or a whole lot of rocket fuel.