[After his talk with Gershel Nanjo is rather curious about a somewhat large chunk of the student body he knows very little about. Being in the dark would be terribly unusual of him, as his thirst for knowledge is always ever-expanding.]

I seek guidance on how to better understand Pokemon.

As they are not native species of my homeworld, any material on the subject would be welcome. I have already enrolled in Pokemon Studies and started researching, but it is best to learn wisdom by the experience of others.

Thus I turn to you, Pokemon and Pokemon Trainers alike.

Thank you.

[Hey! At least he's learned to say thank you during the last three years and also not act like a douche 99% of the time.]

[Snake's in his personal quarters, looking about as languid as he typically has been. He's propped back in his chair. Binder's flipped open. He appears to be grading... something. Probably an essay on what everyone learned at the Box Camp. At least the people who went. Anyone who didn't and wrote an essay was probably spouting bullshit.

Good thing he can bullshit real well.]

Huh. Last time I was going to say something, I was getting hit on by a woman - and not in the good way. [It's true. Last time he was on the network, Eli was beating him down for being drunk. He's amazingly sober this time around.]

I've got some good news for my students. [He waves some loose papers back and forth.] These aren't half bad. I'm beginning to think you guys are actually listening.

[A pause.]

Bad news is. If you didn't show up to that outing and you turned something in anyway, you're not getting any credit for it. Because you weren't there. I guess your punishment is that you have to eat a panel of a box. If you have any questions about what that's like, go see Captain Falcon and Instructor Aran. I'm sure they can tell you all about it.

[He can too, but he's not going to.] Next paper's going to be on the evolution of boxes and their advancements over time. [In short, come to another class of Boxes 101 where Snake pretends to be this guy named Pliskin and spouts random crap for forty-five minutes to an hour.]

[On the feed currently is one nun in full-blown battle armor. Her face looks a bit on the stern side, but she seems happy, more or less. At least she's wearing a good-natured smiled.]

Some of you may already know me, but to those of you who don't, hello! My name is Sister Helga Wilhelmina, but you all may call me "Sister Hel" or just "Sister" if you prefer. In addition to donating some of my time to helping Rhys in the infirmary, I will also be teaching Physical Education! I hope all of you are ready to work hard, because we don't accept slackers in my class. Sloth is a sin!

[At the word sin, Sister Hel's expression turns a bit more serious. Her smile is gone, replaced with a cold sternness. The kind of sternness that always means LECTURE TIME.]

Ah! And speaking of sin, that brings me to the next thing I wanted to discuss! I'm sure you've all noticed the doughnuts that have begone to run...er...float rampant around our lovely school! Most of you no doubt are enjoying them, but need I remind you all that gluttony is a sin? Besides! If you eat to much you will get sick, and as one of the school nurses I'm afraid I simply cannot let that happen! Your health is my top priority as a teacher, a nurse, and a nun. As such, any doughnut I find floating will be reduced to ash within seconds! It shouldn't take long at all for things to return back to normal, hahahahaha!

[And just to prove it, she points her mace in the direction of one floating doughnut near her and blasts it with a laser, thus...reducing it to ash instantly. Just like she said.

Wow.

The feed ends shortly after that, but Sister Hel can indeed be found around the school, blasting rogue doughnuts to oblivion. Feel free to contact her before or after that happens via the network, or just stumble across it actually happening.]

[Greetings, Smash Academy. Today your video feed is greeted by a new kid with black hair! And the top of his hair is all you can see, since the screen of his computer is tilted a little too far back.]

There we go, got it. [It seems like it took him a bit to figure out how the computers here worked, but there’s a sense of accomplishment in his voice at working these computers so quickly. He’s seen computers before, but not like this. It’s actually pretty cool!]

So, I can communicate with others using this. Oh.

[And he just noticed he’s not seen well on the screen. He pulls the screen forward and then you all can see the adorable face behind the voice.]

Looks like it’s working. [He clears his throat.]

Hello everyone, I’m a transfer student from Talim Medical School in Fennmont. I’m going to be continuing my studies here while doing some research. I’ll also be helping the school nurses. So, if you’re hurt and need to be healed you can come to me. My name is Jude Mathis. It’s nice to meet you all. I hope we can have a good school year, everyone.

[Just then he remembers something else.]

Oh, and… [He pulls a sheet of paper out from off screen.] Does anyone know where I can find… a Mr. Rhys and a Sister Hel? If you do, please let me know. I’m a little unfamiliar with this place.

[Should he ask about the hands…? No, no they’re probably wearing silly costumes to greet students, maybe this school has a good sense of humor... Little does he know.]

[Not that Sakura is tech challenged, exactly, but video networks put you on the spot a bit. Not something she enjoys.]

...Hello. I wish to make a formal introduction. My name is Sakura Oogami. I am new to this school.

[...Is that enough? That's not enough.]

I would also like to inquire about what sports clubs are available in this school, wrestling in particular. I was told this school houses great fighters, and so I hope to challenge all of you, eventually.

For now, however, I have one more question: Where is the best place in town to buy protein?

[Good evening, Smash Academy. Today you are greeting with a shot of DAS AUTOSHOP, where a great many half-finished and slightly ominous-looking vehicular-type projects grace the background. Falcon sits in front of the feed and leans in.]

Football tryouts. If you're not on the team and want to be, show up. We're co-ed and take all grade levels. If you're already on the team, show up anyway. Check in with either myself or Max Powers, he's the other coach.

I ordered new uniforms.

[He is wearing his Flaming Hobos t-shirt.]

Friday, on the field, six PM sharp. Looking for a new team captain. Express interest and ask your questions here.