001- [video] - Laytex all the way down...

[black_shadow]

[Black Shadow does not appear in public without his costume, no matter how much it looks like the school network has been invading by sketchy fetish spam. He sits with his arms folded in front of the camera, like he's sizing up everyone watching it. He clears his throat.]

...Greetings Smash Acadamy. My name is Black Shadow and you may know me as a world famous F-Zero racer and the revered Emperor of Evil! HAHAHAHAHAH!

...I am also your new Drivers Ed teacher.

I am told I can't make the class mandatory, but I strongly urge you to come. Driving is a far more vital skill than you can ever know.

As for my new...colleges: I look forward to working with you.

[He smirks briefly, like there's something about to happen and he can't wait to see how it's going to turn out. Amazing how menacing that can make a normally meaningless pleasantry.]

Comments

WHO COULD THIS ANON BE MY GOODNESS

[black_shadow]

No doubt you're thrilled to learn this. I imagine my supposed death made quite a wave.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fj7Vklv5nDk

[raced_god]

Left a big mess to clean up, if that's what you mean.

For the record, I didn't think you were dead.

[Spoilers, though: he totally allowed himself to HOPE]

[black_shadow]

Glad to hear it. I'd hate to think my reign of terror could be erased so easily.

Hard to believe anyone could think I was dead.

[raced_god]

Well, you're not. Congratulations.

[This is about where Falcon does that stupid thing he always does where he rushes headfirst into an inevitable death trap without backup, except this time he isn't about to be taken by surprise. He isn't sure if Black Shadow remembers their first encounter at the Academy--he might, given the fact that he apparently isn't even bothering to put up a front. What he does know is that he's prepared, or at least, substantially more prepared than last time.

The guy's broadcasting from an office, and the directory's already been updated, so Falcon knows where to find him, even. It's not the smartest of things to do (really, it is kind of stupid), suiting up and marching right over there, but Falcon is many things, and indirect is not necessarily one of them.

HE KNOCKS

ON THE DOOR.]

[black_shadow]

[This was inevitable.

Black Shadow had known someone would know him: how far does an infamous racing star/criminal have to go before he isn't recognized?

But somehow, Shadow is sure that the person who knocked on the door isn't someone he has to worry about. They knocked on the door, for crying out loud! If it were Falcon, it would have been kicked off the hinges.

So Shadow could be forgiven for keeping his guard down and simply calling:]

It's open.

[raced_god]

[Oh. Oh it's open.

Falcon kicks in the door. He has his gun, and he is angry.]

I will give you one chance to leave.

[black_shadow]

[Shadow doesn't even look at the gun, just smiling like the cat who ate the Falcon canary.]

It is against the rules to shoot your coworkers, so the Hands tell me.

["This is your life now, Falcon," is the unstated sentiment.]

[raced_god]

[This is his life now.]

Yeah? Are you planning to play by those rules?

[He sure didn't play by those rules last time--Falcon has the scars to prove it. He doesn't lower his gun.]

[black_shadow]

Falcon...it wounds me that you even have to ask!

[He's being deliberately cryptic, but he also isn't making any threatening moves. He wants Falcon to know that he's playing a new game without telling him the rules.]

[raced_god]

[Black Shadow doesn't have to be cryptic--Falcon picks up what he's putting down regardless. To expect this guy to play by the rules is asking for a cold day in hell. He doesn't move any further into the room, but he also doesn't shoot. There's something he needs to know, first. It would, at the very least, explain the dramatic difference in introduction.]

You don't remember.

[black_shadow]

[That...was unexpected. Shadow's smile faults, replaced with a look of confusion.]

Remember...what?

[raced_god]

[It takes Falcon a moment to realize he can use this to his advantage, at least psychologically speaking. That means, of course, that Black Shadow isn't going to get an answer, just another jerk of his gun.]

We don't have to do this here. We can settle it on the track.

[ALWAYS ON THE TRACK]

[black_shadow]

The track...The track!

[His laughter is brittle, a hint of what's simmering under the the surface. Black Shadow was changed by his time in Deathborn's domain, and the fact that Falcon might suggest that he risk something like that again...Falcon truly has no idea.]

That time is over, Falcon. Long over.

[raced_god]

[THE TRACK.]

Why are you still in that chair, then?

[Says Falcon, still standing in the doorway.]

Don't tell me the hands gave you a shock collar, too. You can match your lap dog.

[black_shadow]

Gee, Falcon, I don't know! Why don't you tell me: Why am I still in this chair?

[raced_god]

i don't know why are you in that chair

Because you don't know what's good for you.

[Leave or I kill you being the sentiment expressed.]

[black_shadow]

Falcon...Do you really not understand yet?

I'm now a teacher.

[raced_god]

[He wants to say you were a teacher before, but ultimately decides that's something to keep to himself for now.]

Is that supposed to dissuade me, or something?

[black_shadow]

[He stands up, slowly, less out of consideration for the gun and more out of his contempt for Falcon.]

You're acting dense, Falcon, but I know better. I know you know there's nowhere you can run and nowhere you can hide. You look at me and you see the destruction of everything you've worked so hard to build here.

[He paces, slowly and deliberately, so not to draw Falcon's fire. He needs to finish his monologue after all.]

I sent Blood to this school because I knew this was where you were, and he enrolled rather than kill you outright because it's against the rules for a teacher causing unsanctioned harm to a student.

Tell me: if you shot me now, what do you think would happen?

[raced_god]

[All this has happened before, he has to remind himself before he gets angry and scratches his itchy trigger finger.

Realistically, the answer is probably something like "you'd use your stupid powers to stop the laser or something", but he can think of a better answer.]

A lot of people would be better off.

[And if it means Master Hand throwing him out of the school, so be it. He'd been ready to pack up and leave not long ago.]

[black_shadow]

[Black Shadow is almost impressed by that answer.]

Would they? Or would every two-bit criminal in the galaxy rise up to take my place all at once? Wouldn't that be something to see!

[Despite the obvious satisfaction on his face at imagining it, he's getting bored of talking. The plan is to catch Falcon off-guard, but impatience is threatening to win out, and his hands twitch with anticipation.]

[raced_god]

[All of this has already happened--Black Shadow's absence left quite a mess, but he has to remind himself that the power vacuum is filled again. He has no idea how long Black Shadow thinks he was...wherever he was, but he's willing to bet that it's been longer on his end.]

Let's find out.

[black_shadow]

[Well, those are fighting words if Shadow has ever heard them! The first thing to do is remove that gun and the most fun way to do that would be to kick Falcon's legs out from under him and take it.

He moves quickly for a giant man, leaping out of his chair (only partly thanks to floating powers) to charge and slide at Falcon, legs outstretched. Hopefully he can break an ankle or two.]

[raced_god]

[Falcon thinks back to that night in June all those years ago--Black Shadow isn't opening with the glowy blue magic, but that doesn't mean he won't use it. He has no intention of making the same mistakes that got him shot the first time they did this.

He rolls, ducking out of the way of the offense, and starts firing laser bolts as he rights himself.]

[black_shadow]

[Black Shadow slides straight out into the hall and springs up to duck behind the wall to put some cover between him and the shots.]

Is that all you've got Falcon? Didn't you miss me, or is this just your way of showing it?