001- [video] - Laytex all the way down...

[black_shadow]

[Black Shadow does not appear in public without his costume, no matter how much it looks like the school network has been invading by sketchy fetish spam. He sits with his arms folded in front of the camera, like he's sizing up everyone watching it. He clears his throat.]

...Greetings Smash Acadamy. My name is Black Shadow and you may know me as a world famous F-Zero racer and the revered Emperor of Evil! HAHAHAHAHAH!

...I am also your new Drivers Ed teacher.

I am told I can't make the class mandatory, but I strongly urge you to come. Driving is a far more vital skill than you can ever know.

As for my new...colleges: I look forward to working with you.

[He smirks briefly, like there's something about to happen and he can't wait to see how it's going to turn out. Amazing how menacing that can make a normally meaningless pleasantry.]

Comments

[bloodvile]

I know, I couldn't believe it either!

[black_shadow]

Well, it's just so heartwarming that a woman saw past Falcon's looks and his clothes and the way he talks and his personality and his terrible driving and his breath!

[bloodvile]

It's a damn shame when there's so many better and way more handsome suitors out there! She's rude and hits like a truck, too.

[black_shadow]

Let's hope she knocks his teeth in someday then.

Have you been in contact with Falcon's enemies then?

[bloodvile]

Just that Bowser Koopa guy. He's hard to miss--big turtle dragon thing with spikes and claws and stuff.

[black_shadow]

What, like Pico?

Anyway, we need to start making plans...Falcon can't spend another minute untortured.

[bloodvile]

Kinda. He actually has hair.

Definitely. It's been too long. His stupid car needs a good wrecking too.

[black_shadow]

I agree. Get on that ASAP. That's an order.

The first step in our larger plans is to gain a foot hold in this school. I can trust you as my enforcer, correct?

[bloodvile]

Like you even have to ask.

[black_shadow]

Excellent!

...Now that that's out of the way, how are your grades?