001- [video] - Laytex all the way down...

[black_shadow]

[Black Shadow does not appear in public without his costume, no matter how much it looks like the school network has been invading by sketchy fetish spam. He sits with his arms folded in front of the camera, like he's sizing up everyone watching it. He clears his throat.]

...Greetings Smash Acadamy. My name is Black Shadow and you may know me as a world famous F-Zero racer and the revered Emperor of Evil! HAHAHAHAHAH!

...I am also your new Drivers Ed teacher.

I am told I can't make the class mandatory, but I strongly urge you to come. Driving is a far more vital skill than you can ever know.

As for my new...colleges: I look forward to working with you.

[He smirks briefly, like there's something about to happen and he can't wait to see how it's going to turn out. Amazing how menacing that can make a normally meaningless pleasantry.]

Comments

[Video]

[pyroblasters]

Emperor of Evil, eh? Doesn't exactly seem like the kinda thing you want to announce around a Hero of Justice! Though, Pyrrhon supposes he shouldn't go meddling in petty mortal affairs.

[Video]

[black_shadow]

I've met many many so-called Heroes of Justice in my time. All you'll been missing out on is a chance to be killed like the rest.

[Video]

[pyroblasters]

Well, clearly you've just never been enough of a problem to warrant any divine intervention, then! Mortals can't exactly kill Gods, after all.

[Video]

[black_shadow]

Oh, I see. Very cute that you think I'm a mortal man. I've had a God or two after me in my time, in fact.

[Video]

[pyroblasters]

Yikes, talk about an ego. Pyrrhon's pretty sure you're clearly a mortal human! And he's also sure that if any Gods DID go after you, that they clearly weren't as mighty as PYRRHON, THE SUN GOD!

Buuuuut like I said, not going to go meddling in mortal affairs. So long as you don't go causing trouble in Pyrrhon's presence, there won't be any problems! Besides, if Pyrrhon takes you out, then he won't be able to attend your class!

I've always thought about getting a license. Flying's probably more convenient and all, but getting to drive an exo-tank just looks so fun!

[Video]

[black_shadow]

[mutter mutter] I won't take shit about my ego from anyone who talks in the third person...

But yes, I agree! What good is going from place to place in anything but a wickedly fast and powerful machine?

...A curiosity but...does the name Deathborn mean anything to you?

[Video]

[pyroblasters]

Well, there's always the fact that you get there. Pyrrhon would consider that pretty good?

Deathborn? Nope, can't say I've ever heard the name. Why do you ask?

[Video]

[black_shadow]

Oh, no reason. I suppose it's just a question I'll never get answered now.

What good is getting there if you can't get there in style?