We interupt this video feed with robots.

[explosion_day]

[Since Rick has been back from his unannounced "vacation"--having spent the past two weeks on the bottom of a dirty floor--he was eager to get his Adventuring Legs back up and operational.

...Figuratively speaking, of course. Management rails were explored with renewed fervor. Rick had a lot to catch up on after all, and everyone had been missing his rugged manly good looks, certainly. Especially the lady types. GLaDOS was no exception in his mind, especially since he knew where her secret underground lair was. The video feed clicks on long after he's penetrated the deepest and darkest part of her sanctum, and Rick narrates in a hushed (read: only moderately quieter than he normally speaks) voice.]

I'll tell you, few men venture down here into her lair. You wanna' know why? Dark, dangerous, big and--shh, shh.

[The ceiling-view creeps forward, GLaDOS's mammoth lair coming into view. She's tucked away in the back part of it, a little side-room.]

Here, we observe the female in her natural habitat. She's gorgeous, a real beauty. Wild and untamed like a tank-mounted machine gun, or a... wait...

[ZOOMING IN... there is a tiny little creature near her; whitish gray with yellow eyes. GLaDOS stood at the back of the chamber, peering down at the small creature, a chao, with a look of disappointment. A hand was at her forehead as she massaged her temples. Finally, she sighed, letting her arm fall back down to her side as she glared creature one last time.]

Alright, look. This isn't that difficult. In fact, you should have no problems with this because I'm the one doing most the work. All you need to do is keep up your part while I conduct.

Now, let's take it from the top. Alright?

[To that, the chao nodded.]

Good, good. Now, let's begin.

[At that moment, several turrets around the AI turned on. She pulled out a conducting baton from her coat, expanded its length, then began waving it. The turrets moved their sides in reply, making their own odd beat. Once it was the little chao's turn, it began singing in time to the music. All in all, it should sound similar to this. A few moments of it pass before Rick comments again.]

She's with offspring. Lots of them. Buncha' cute ones and some kinda' blobbly big-headed reject baby thing.

[Is... is GLaDOS...? That melody is oddly entrancing. Like a Siren Song. Rick dumbly creeps forward to get a better look, into plain and open view.]

What is that thing? Must be the runt of the litter.

[The sound of another's voice causes GLaDOS to freeze up. With her baton no longer moving, the turrets no longer continue playing their music and her chao stops along with them. She slowly turns her head towards Rick, obviously TRYING to hold her anger down but failing miserably at it.]

...you've been recording this entire ordeal, haven't you?

[Did that baton just snap in her hands? ...oh this isn't gonna end well. The ceiling-camera doesn't answer immediately, because the obvious answer is yes, view darting left and right before focusing back at the deadly robowoman. Dangerous, indeed..]

Quick! [BACKING UP but the camera view seems to succeed only in quickly backing up in tight, concentric circles.] Abort mission! She's fiercely territorial with her babies. Motherly instinct and all that. Could rip the arms off a man with just her teeth.

...Man, I am so turned on right now.

Comments

[after_the_flower]

I didn't know Teacher adopted a chao.

She's teaching it how to sing, too. It sounds nice.

[did_well_enough]

[Yeah, GLaDOS is still in the process of trying to beat Rick to death with a large wrench. However, when she hears Sophie's voice, she stopped.]

It should. After all the practicing we've done.

[explosion_day]

[Rick may be scooting around saying something along the lines of "Look, I know you can't keep your hands off me but--" while trying to not get killed/dismantled/ect]

[testgasm]

[There is nothing that is not horrifying. And maybe disgusting. But mostly horrifying.]

That's--you are just unbelievable.

[explosion_day]

I know.

It's okay to be jealous, Wheats. Go on, admit it.

[testgasm]

She's going to kill you, Adventure Sphere.

Not that I'm complaining. Carry on.

[findthepenguin]

Pfffftttt--- hahahahahahahaha!

Gee, Glados-sensei, I didn't know you had an artsy side to you. I thought you were just a giant black hole.

[did_well_enough]

[The message comes a bit later, after GLaDOS thinks she chased Rick off with a giant wrench. Spoiler: she didn't.]

Well you're an idiot, so I would imagine that there is a lot you don't know.

[findthepenguin]

Hmph. Takes one to know one.

[neveraskedforthis]

[ Wtf did he just watch.

Anyway thanks for showing him Glados' lair, Rick. ]


Robots can be turned on? That's a new one.


[ clearly the most important part of that whole thing. ]

[explosion_day]

Depends if you're a lady type or not.

[Adam. Are you a lady type.]

[neveraskedforthis]

[ He can be anything you like, Rick, as long as he gets to DOMINATE. ]

What if I said yes.

[ video ]

[obfuskate]

[ ... ah. well then.

she does still have a little bit of caroline left in her, after all. ]

I have three important questions.

Who are you, will you do this again, and will you continue to publicize it for all to see?

[ at least him. he's... a curious little creephog, but he's not about to admit that. just going to make it seem like evading invasion of privacy as per whatever codes of conduct this school upholds. (or rather, tries to.) ]

[video]

[explosion_day]

[Rick's video feed is still entirely from his perspective, so Shadow will unfortunately only have the pleasure of his voice.]

Name's Rick.

[It is a manly voice, which he lowers in a hush-hush pseudo whisper to Shadow (read: still kind of loud).]

If it gets her jimmies all rustled up again, probably. You got a special request for next time?

Re: [video]

[obfuskate]

You are strictly prohibited from doing that.

...

Should you continue, however, I would request more musical moments like these.

[ wow yep. it's glados, so bias is takin' over here. he has a duty to perform, but miiiixed feeeeelings combined with spiiiite. ]

[breaks_pots]

Miss Glados! Are you alright?! Should I come down and protect you?

[He might not know how to get into her inner sanctum, but he felt confident that if his teacher needed him, she'd magic him down there.

...the babies were kind of cute.]

[did_well_enough]

No thank you, Link. It's just a minor problem, really. Sadly I've run out of pesticide, so I'll have to squash this insect manually.

[GLaDOS must like cute things, I guess.]

[explosion_day]

Hey, you got bug problems GLaDDY you should know to give me a call. Mantis-men? More like man-dead... men. Bugs.

[Because obviously you aren't talking about Rick. Obviously.]

[breaks_pots]

Okay.

[It's okay. Link likes cute things, too.]

They um... they sing really well. Maybe we could play together sometime?

[Video; And the grandest of tags]

[bluestreaker]

[ SNORT. ]

[Video; I am honored to be the receiver of it]

[did_well_enough]

I fail to see what's so funny.

[Video]

[bluestreaker]

Who said I was laughin' at ya?

[ Sonic leans toward the camera. ]

Didn't take ya for a music lover. [ SONIC FUCKIN' LOVES MUSIC. ]

[video]

[makesithot]

Hey, Rick, is that you? Who's that you're watching?

[Pause. Then, Chili grins, and he quirks and eyebrow.] Heyyy, wait, is that... your girlfriend?! Am I right?!

8') CHILI <3

[explosion_day]

Heh--Yeah, somethin' like that.

[Something like that that is currently trying to murder him.]

Gladdy--She's a bit of a rough one, you know? Onea' those fiery types. Takes a real special type of guy to tame.

RICK STOP MISLEADING HIM

[makesithot]

Oh, hey, you told me about her! I had no idea she was supposed to be your girlfriend, though. You should have said so! TO be honest, I didn't think robot guys like you could even have girlfriends, but was I ever wrong!

But doesn't she seem kinda mad? She snapped that baton right in two! Maybe you should try to "tame" her, like you say you can... I wanna see how you do it!