smashacademy | 001

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001 | Video

I suppose introductions would be appropriate, now that the paperwork is done with...

[A tall, shirtless man with dishevelled blonde hair and cool eyes is on the other end of the feed. Dress codes? Pshaw, maybe later. His coat is just casually slung over the back of the chair. He seems restless, idly twirling the pen in his hand and shifting in his chair. When he speaks, it's with a careless British accent that sounds constantly sarcastic, somehow.]

Greetings, students and faculty! I am Liquid Snake, your new biology and public speaking teacher. What a bore... Ah, well. I suppose we do as we must.

Oh - and before I forget, this is a unique opportunity. Not since the Middle East have I found myself among such potential soldiers. Play nice, children. I'll be keeping an eye on you. If you're any good, perhaps I'll even be facing you on the battlefield...

[With a wicked little laugh, he turns it off.]

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You aren't simply among potentials.

[ All this talk coming from -- what is this thing? A porcupine? ]

Liquid. [ A raise of a brow. What a codename. This man, he's a soldier, too, but under what country? The United Nations, perhaps? GUN?

At any rate, it feels... awkward. Ominous, perhaps? He isn't sure. ]

. . .

I have to ask. What's the deal with the costume?

[A slight pause. There's the possibility this might just be the guy's quirk, so he doesn't add the 'ridiculous' he was going to. Instead he simply cocks his head slightly and smirks.]

Confident, I see. That's good.

[ Really?

Shadow makes it a point to tug at his cheek, hard, something that apparently doesn't bother him, as his expression stays relatively flat and, uh... frowny. Basically, typical Shadow face. ]

Fool. This isn't a costume. Clearly you cannot recognize a hedgehog when you see one.

...

Since when do hedgehogs talk? Or, for that matter, look so entirely unlike hedgehogs?

Or should I suppose you've been exposed to gene therapy or radiation and leave it at that?

In my world, all hedgehogs are like this, at the very least in appearance. [ In power and abilities, thaaaat is a whole different story. ]

Get used to it. This world is full of components from others, some of which will be strange to you. This is not the least of what you will find here.

[ A huff. This one is terribly unprepared... ]

I'm more used to the type that you can hold in your hand and eat.

But I guess I'll just have to 'get used to it', as you said. I suppose it isn't the weirdest thing I've ever seen.

Hold in your hand... and eat.

[ The look on his face is nothing short of a wild, disgusted, silent warning of, "DON'T YOU EVEN DARE TRY IT, BUB." ]

When you're in the wilds, anything goes. Survival comes before all else.

[Please, he doesn't eat things that talk.]

In the wild, yes, but I better not catch you eating anyone on the premises.

[ He cringes visibly. That would be so disgusting. ]

There's a difference between anyone and anything, Mister Hedgehog. I don't eat people.

... Are you implying that we are things? Keep in mind that you, too, are a primate. Of course, some humans do lack an unsurprising amount of common knowledge.

[ He narrows his eyes. Yes, he's basically calling him stupid. ]

Don't be a fool. I merely meant to say that I have no intention of eating anything sentient. It would be quite unpleasant.

'Don't be a fool', you say.

[ He gives a wry grin. Oh, the irony. ]

This is your own fault for your poor wording. Watch yourself as you speak. [ check urself b4 u wreck urself ]

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