An Action Jock

[flamedog]

In the evenings, for about half an hour, there is a howling that has struck up over the last three or four nights. The originator of said howls is one Jock ("Jock") the Arcanine™. If you speak either Pogglespeech or Doge, you can understand what is being said:

"Go away, moon."
"Nobody wants you."
"You have a stupid face."
"I'll bite you if you come here."
"You're the worst."
"My mom could kick your butt."
"You can't even handle this, bro."
"Leave and don't come back."
"You're a stupid moon."
"I'll set you on fire if you don't go back to where you're supposed to be."

Maybe someone should tell him to shut up. Or maybe someone should join him to tell the moon what's for.

Comments

[whirlwind_wolfman]

[There might or might not be some terrible, blood-curdling howls coming from the mountains in agreement to some of these sentiments.]

[flamedog]

::Hi, friend Jon! Hi! It's me, Jock! Hi! The moon is a butt! How are you?::

[whirlwind_wolfman]

[Terrible oh god terrible everything is awful I can't change back and spend all my time in pain and wanting to break the world in two. How's your day, then?]

[flamedog]

::Hi, do you need me to cheer you up? I'm very good at cheering people up! I can sit with you and lick your face. Do you need cuddles? I can give cuddles.::

[whirlwind_wolfman]

[No, better that you didn't - When I'm changed by the moon I have a terrible habit of wanting to kill everything. I'd sooner not be near anyone. I'd sooner kill the moon.]

[flamedog]

::You don't want to kill me. You like me, I'm your best good friend Jock. Remember? Remember being a happy, sweet sunshine boy? You can be a happy sweet sunshine boy if you try.::

[planking]

[ARE WE BARKING AT THINGS. Boney wants to bark at things too.]

[flamedog]

::HI BONEY lick lick lick LET'S HOWL AT THIS STUPID MOON::

[planking]

[AW YEAH WE'RE GONNA MAKE NOISE ALL NIGHT-]

[planking]

[Oh my GOD where is that racket coming from. A very disgruntled cowboy appears!]

Hey-! Cut that out, it's two in the morning!

[flamedog]

We're doing important dog business!

::rarararwwrarrrarawr!::

[planking]

[VERY VERY IMPPORTANT. BARK BARK BARK.]

[planking]

Folks are trying to sleep!

[Flint are you arguing with dogs at 2AM.]

[flamedog]

::rarararoorrrrraaaaaaar!::

BUT THE MOON IS SO AWFUL!

[hometownchargal]

"Can't say I disagree with ya there..."

Have a dargon plopping right down next to you as she slumps and looks up to the moon annoyed.

"Darn thing needs to get the hell back!"

[flamedog]

"I've been trying to use ROAR every night for the last few nights," said Jock, sounding sort of grumpy.

"It's not running away."

[hometownchargal]

"An' I can't fly close enuff ta even try a Fire Blast, Inferno or Flamethrower... It's downright frustratin' as hell!"

She growled and grumbled in annoyance.

"Roar was a good try though."

[flamedog]

"Yeah," said Jock. "That moon's awful. It's just stupid. It needs to leave. If I could use Flamethower on it, I would burn it all."

[hometownchargal]

"Or Seismic Toss it right back out," she grumbled before sighing.

"I jus' don't want anyone else hurt..." And it sucks to not be able to do anything.

[flamedog]

"Why can't you fly and reach it? You have wings. Is it that far away? It looks really close. I mean, I can see the face in it and everything."

[hometownchargal]

"Too far unfortunately... You'd think with how big it looks that it's closer but... If it's lookin' that big an' I still can't reach it I'm kinda 'fraid of how big it really is."

[flamedog]

"Too big. Nothing should be that big. Except maybe the world. Only the world should be that big."

Wow, Jock, what a clever boy you are.

[hometownchargal]

Riwane nodded and huffed.

"This is bad... very bad... Has your family said anything 'bout whut could be done?" Because hers was... preocupied.

[flamedog]

"I'm gonna protect my mom no matter what, that's what I'm doing," said Jock in a growl.

[hometownchargal]

"Good, an' I'm sure she apreciates that. Jus' hope we can do at least that, protect our loved ones." She's definitely going to give it her all, no matter the cost.

[flamedog]

"Yeah," said Jock. He then turned back to the moon and howled at it again. "You have the worst nose, I want to bite it off and make you look even stupider!"

[hometownchargal]

Riwane felt it wasn't really doing much, but right now she didn't have any better ideas so she joined in by roaring, beating her chest commandingly and blowing fireblasts at the moon. That'll show it!

[charmingribbons]

"Hey! Quiet down! You're keeping everyone awake!"

Oren has found you, Jock, and does not approve.

"And did you just... did you just call the moon 'stupid?'"

[flamedog]

"Yeah, 'cause the moon's stupid!" barked Jock in reply. "It's really, really dumb, and it needs to go back where it came from."

Jock doesn't need your negative attitude here.

[charmingribbons]

Nor does Oren need all that racket at bleep o'clock at night ffs doggggg

"Well, if what you mean is you dislike that giant looming face, then I agree with you. How about we tone things down a little? Try to keep as quiet as we can until after the sun comes up, after which you may yap and rant at anything you desire. How about that?"

[flamedog]

"Daytime isn't for howling! Nighttime is for howling! Any good dog knows that! The moon is dumb and needs to be howled at now!"

[charmingribbons]

Ugh, this guy...!

"I do believe you would howl at the moon because nighttime was the only time you could see it. Now that it looms over us at all hours, I'd think it'd serve the same purpose to howl at it later when no one is sleeping, yes?"

[flamedog]

"Uh, no?" said Jock. "You probably don't understand these things; I'm a dog. I know this stuff. It's important to do it now, and not later."

[travelingbelle]

After the second or third night of this, Jock was not all by himself.

"Hey, buddy."

[flamedog]

Oh gosh it's mom, it's mom, it's mom, it's mom.

Jock licks your face about fifteen times.

"Hi, mom, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, mom."

[travelingbelle]

She giggles about fifteen times and reaches up to ruffle his cheeks.

"Hello to you too." Because he was very obviously saying hello. "Are you trying to roar the moon away?"

[flamedog]

Jock briskly nodded his head up and down. She was so smart, she figured it out on the first try. Little tears glisten in the corners of his eyes. He's so proud of you and your many accomplishments.

[travelingbelle]

Oh no, little tears. Blue didn't want to deal with little tears tonight. So she planted her hands on her hips and swiveled to give the moon a defiant staredown.

"Maybe we both need to roar at it."

[flamedog]

Jock shook his head up and down again, vigorously, and then licked your face twice so as to give you encouragement.

He then roared at the moon with all of his might.

[travelingbelle]

She drew up as much night air as she could into her lungs with a deep, deep breath. While she wasn't an Arcanine, and roar certainly wasn't in her moveset, that wasn't going to stop her. Neither was trying to respect other peoples' bedtimes.

Side by side with her pup, she yelled out as loud and as hard as she could.

[flamedog]

Jock leans over and licks you on the face several times after his howling is over. You're so good at howling! It was very moving. Jock is extremely moved.

He may be crying. He's crying. Why are you so perfect.