[Video.]

[jonny_talbain]

[Jon is looking rough. Really rough. Over the weekend there was a Super Moon, and he'd been away longer than normal, letting his inner beast run free in the mountains away from civilization. These episodes are always draining, physically and mentally.

...and then he comes back to all your crap, Smash Academy. Why oh why did he become a member of Staff, again?]

Look... between attacks by weird creatures from god knows where, purple rifts in the sky, and people apparently arriving from multiple, alternate, backwards or inside out timelines? Is there anyone who needs the help of your friendly local Martial Arts instructor?

If so, speak up now or forever hold your peace.

Comments

[Video]

[blazebottom]

[Of course his partner was never really in the loop of things and she tended to miss out on the elephant in the room. Probably because she lived in her own world of flamethrowers and rainbows, music and games.]

Hey hon! Rough one wasn't it? [She meant the moon.]

What's going on?

Re: [Video]

[jonny_talbain]

Aye. It was. Worse this time than most... I think because of the clear summer skies.

Oh, you know. Monsters attacking the populace, strangers showing up out of nowhere, the sky ripping apart and showing off spontaneous purple portals to realms unknown. Just the usual for this place. I take it you're staying safe?

Re: [Video]

[blazebottom]

There are?!

[Riwane looked around confused.]

Dang, Ah didn't even notice! Then again Ah've been focused in my room an' doin' important stuff!

[Like organizing her huge music folder, dancing in her undies and playing video games. You know. Priorities.]

Re: [Video]

[jonny_talbain]

Well, I can't say I'm not relieved that you've not been swept up in this craziness. You're safe, and I'm glad of that. I'm back now, however, so should you need me, I'll have my cellphone on at all times.

Re: [Video]

[blazebottom]

But whut is it Ah'm safe from? Whut should Ah be lookin' out fur?

Re: [Video]

[jonny_talbain]

Monsters from under the school comprised of shadow bugs. Mostly small and easy to knock off but I daresay that in numbers, they could be dangerous.

Re: [Video]

[blazebottom]

Got it! Sounds easy enuff, a good fire spin or flamethrower should take care of any, if not some swarms. That's what it's fur! Well, technically not fur that but still!

[video]

[lovely_wind]

Are you perhaps speaking of self-defense lessons?

Re: [video]

[jonny_talbain]

That or just throwing uninvited alternate reality guests out of dorms. Destroying meddlesome monsters causing havoc. If you've need of some basic lessons in self defense though, Madame, I'd be happy to oblige.

Re: [video]

[lovely_wind]

Well, I live alone, off campus, you see. It's been quite some time since I have properly fought any adversaries, and I'm ashamed to admit I might be a tad rusty...

[jonny_talbain]

Certainly. Are you able to meet me in the stadium some time this afternoon?

[That would give him at least a little time to rest up and have some lunch.]

[lovely_wind]

That would be fabulous, dahling~! I'll see you then!

[aaaaand move to action post?]

[Action!]

[jonny_talbain]

[Jon was in the stadium at the agreed time. It was set to the most simple, basic setting right now to avoid any technical malfunctions due to shadow bugs or what have you.]

Good afternoon, Madame. I've cleared my schedule for the afternoon so, we ought to have ample time to teach you some good, solid self defense.

Video

[fakespeech]

[Here's someone looking excited about all this. Ecolo waves his shadowy hand at the screen.]

Ooohh Martial Arts? Like throwing punches and kicking? Would it really help to punch the weird shadows~?

Re: Video

[jonny_talbain]

If you punch hard enough, you can hit anything. Even shadows.

[Speaking of weird shadows....]

Don't believe we've met, yet?

[fakespeech]

I've met people like that before! They're weird and kind of scary, always laughing like this...

[He imitates a queen-like gesture, putting a hand near his face.]

"Ooohohoho!"

[Ecolo blinks his beady eyes at the screen before waving.]

Oh, we haven't met? Hm, I guess so, with these shadows popping out, it's really hard to notice new faces after all~!

[jonny_talbain]

Right.

[Interesting impression.]

I'm Jon Talbain, the school's Martial Arts teacher, as I've said. What was your name?

[fakespeech]

Jon Talbain? You look like Mister Spiky Hair to me, though. But okay! Hi Mister Jon Talbain! My name's Ecolo!

[jonny_talbain]

....Mister Spiky hair? Ah. I think Mr. Talbain ought to be just fine, thank you.

It's nice to meet you as well, Ecolo. You're not like anyone I've seen before. Where are you from?

[vela_nova]

It seems all of this chaos has built to a head finally.

Are you well?

[jonny_talbain]

Aye. It does seem that way.

I've... had a rough weekend.

[vela_nova]

I imagine... What with the moon as it was. [Yeah, she knew about werewolves and full moons.]

Although coming back may not be any smoother for you.

[jonny_talbain]

....when the moon is that close to the earth, there are few things that are harder to deal with.

I trust you've had no trouble?

[vela_nova]

...I can't contact my world. The Sol Emeralds can't transport me back. And whatever is going on here, it must be connected. I don't know how.

[jonny_talbain]

Well. That IS a problem.

I wish I knew what to offer up as a solution.