smashacademy | [Video]

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[The feed turns on to reveal a big wet nose hogging up most of the camera space. It moves back, revealing a wide-eyed tauren face.]

Ah! It works! [Wow, what kind of crazy-ass accent is THAT?]

Lok'tar! Hello! This device - it is Gnomish? It hasn't exploded so far, so definitely not Goblin... I have never seen anything like this. Even the writing of... of...

[She wrinkles her nose and pantomimes writing something on her palm.]

...Mail! Even the writing of mail is not common in my tribe. We prefer face-to-face. But, as this is speaking and not writing, it is still good, I think. I-I know it will help me to practice the human tongue. You can probably hear I am still learning.

[She laughs nervously, rubbing the side of her face. Then she glances away, trying to remember something.]

...Oh! I was so excited, I forgot the most important thing. My name is Aquenda Tenderhoof. I think, maybe, I come at a strange time. There was a festival, but great beasts came to destroy it. [Sorta.] Also, I have heard of floods? To speak of that, if anybody can tell me your rituals in receiving elemental blessings here, that would be helpful very much.

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[Anyone still watching the video can hear another voice sqawk from the other side of the room.]

Technology makes for some impressive sorcery, doesn't it?

[WHAT. That's not her bird's squawk. She turns around (standing, because no way is she going to fit into these tiny chairs).]

Ah... Technology and the arcane, are they truly the same? I didn't think so...

[She glances to the pile of boots + portal gun combo she received when arriving at the school.]

There is a lot of it here, either way.

Edited 2012-07-31 15:35 (UTC)

[Snort, snicker-snicker,]

Dude, someone left the freezer open and the fuckin' food's talkin' on the camera. Go get that shit before we miss out on some kickin' burgers!

Nothing better than fresh beef right?

[/SIGH]

Oh... Yes, I never have heard this before. Ha ha.

Don't worry tits, I gots hundreds of em!

Or wait, should I call you udders?

[Snerk. This looks promising already. [DON'T WORRY KITTY HITS ON ALL THE FEMMES LIKE THIS!]

Only call me Aquenda. Please.

I have seen cows in the Eastern Kingdoms. We're different. I promise.

S'that right?

So, Aquenda... I can't rhyme any cow jokes with that name... that ain't fair dude haha!

Welcome to shit aca err Smash Academy, blah blah all that do good don't suck have fun bullshit. Yay for welcoming committee huh?

[Oh, she's so relieved for that...]

I hoped for maybe warmer welcomes.

There's a bunch of fire types, go ask them to make you a bonfire and sing kumbafuckinya if you want a warmer welcome.

Shit got real and now you're here dude. But hey, at least you're cute! Got that shit goin' for ya at least.

Bet your 'moo' is pretty hot.

[Is she being hit on? Is she being insulted? Both? WHAAAAAAT]

Thank you? I think...

No problem aqua gal.

If ya wana chill or what the fuck ever, just hit me up.

What in the world are you supposed to be?

A tauren...?

Is that some sort of pokemon?

I do not know that word.

We are a people just like... ah... your people... [PRESUMABLY?!]

So a bunch of snot-nosed brats don't run around trying to turn you into some sort of bizarre pet thing?

What?! N-no! That happens here?

There's some country where they do that to all the animals there.

I'd be careful about trusting the humans if I were you. Some of them probably want to make you fight for them.

~~One day I'll canon update to MoP and tell you all about my homeland's Pokemon.~~

Many people where I come from, they have animal companions who fight by their side. But I think even humans are smart enough to know I am not one... right...?

They're pretty dumb, especially the ones that love pokemon.

It is a good thing to keep in mind, then. I do not fight for just anybody.

Holy cow! Seems like someone brought the cows home! I better Moooove out of the way.

... I'll leave the puns to the cat next time.

[Aque's well thought-out response comes in the form of smacking her head against the desk a few times.]

Just be lucky the cat girl isn't here. She would have kept going and never stop.

Thank you for stopping, then. But I get the feeling this isn't the end...

Some people like a good Pun.

So, what are you?

They are enjoyable more when they are original.

I am a Tauren. And you, you are... hu...man? [Those eyes make her look more Forsaken, but her complexion looks way too healthy to be undead.]

I'm a fan of the classics.

I'm a human, or rather, I was a human. Now I'm Peacock.

But a peacock, it's a... bird? Or else it is just a name?

My name is Peacock. I just didn't want to bore you with what exactly I am. Very complicated technical science-y stuff.

Aah.... Yes, I do not know enough about those things.

It is nice meeting you, Peacock.

Not everyone understands all that mumbo jumbo. Even I don't understand all the tech jargon, but I know if I point my laser at someone they will be in a lot of pain.

So, what is a Tauren? A kind of ox or cow?

P-please do not laser at me. It's happened enough. [Eye lasers from Beholders are close enough.]

Tauren are...ah... we are just people, from a place called Kalimdor. We're just the same way the Earthmother made us to be, but why we resemble the cows from across the sea, I do not know this reason. A cruel trick?

As long as you don't give me a reason to laser you, I won't.

Sounds like something from one of those fantasy cartoons with the pretty boy elves and such. Perhaps your "Earthmother" had a thing for cows.

Fantasy? No, pretty elf boys are very real. At least, others all say they're pretty...

I think maybe it is not my place to question the Earthmother.

Never was into the whole pretty boy thing. Probably has to do with me being 13.

What, is she going to appear and go all Earthy on you or something?

Thirteen? So young! Even for a human. There are many children here, aren't there?

...I... don't... know. I won't risk that.

There are some children here, but no one is as awesome or strong as me. Except maybe Marie.

Never was a God fearing sort of Gal. There are much worse things then that out there.

Edited 2012-08-08 12:44 (UTC)

[ Here's someone completely unfazed by Aquenda's appearance and also deals with elves and dragons and things :D ]

Greetings. I hope you're settling in alright. My name is Manah. I'm the guidance counselor here if you need anything. This world can be pretty different from home.

Ah, very thank you. Settling is... not the easiest thing! But it is good to know there will be help.

The engineered devices here, I think, are what will be the biggest problem.

It can be quite a change for many people. I am here if you need help.

The devices are something else, aren't they? I'm afraid I can't help you much there, as they're pretty new to me. I hear these computers are incredibly useful in many things.

Hm... Well, the best way for learning, maybe, is finding out by experimenting! I think I will like trying to work with them.

Or breaking them. Hopefully that is not how things end...

The technology here can be delicate at times. Some is sturdier than others. Experimentation is probably the best.

[AND THEN SHE BLEW UP PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING

that is only a mild exaggeration.]

[ oh dear. ]

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Bowser you are hardly one to ask this question

JEEZ BOWSER.

YEAH I KNOW

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[Private for Dickbaggery]

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pff that icon

It's the only icon I'll ever need

The icon for ever occasion.

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