[Pit loves being dramatic about things. When the video starts, there's nothing there. Suddenly, a humongous head emerges slowly from below. How cryptic! But then surprise! Pit pops out from behind it with a grin.]
Hey! How's it going, guys? I found this while digging through piles of junk. [He stops smiling, then turns the face to look at it with his face pinched in suspicion.]
I think it's a mask. I thought about putting it on, but something told me that wasn't such a good idea. Besides, my face is too small, and it's kind of an ugly mug, don'tcha think?[He twists the head around so its hollow eyes are transfixed on the screen of your personal device.]
But it seems important. I know we need four masks to get into the door of the clock tower. I'll safeguard it until we decide what to do with it.
[It's a phone video from Sonny Moe! He waves at the camera.]
So! I was saving money to buy a car this year! But then, I thought, maybe that money could be used for something better. Something to help cheer everyone up, maybe? Because I know people are scared of the moon and stuff, even though King Bowser's going to have that all under control! So, I was like, what will make everyone happier? Then I remembered it's after Halloween, sooooo...
[And lo, he swivels the camera around to show a MOUNTAIN of candy sitting in an unused classroom.]
Yeah, you guessed it! I spent pretty much my life savings on super discounted Halloween candy to share with you all! I'm in the old Algebra classroom because I thought maybe it was time something fun happened in there! Come and get whatever you like!
[It's Gordon, and he's looking more Frazzled than he normally is. Visibly tired, hair disheveled, tie missing. He even takes off his glasses for a moment to rub over his face before he speaks.]
We've got a new development in the moon... situation. A reliable source mentioned to me that the person that caused the instance in Termina was actually under control of a mask. I mean ANOTHER mask. They, uh, drew a picture:
[So suddenly a file with this image attached is broadcast to everyone:]
[Good luck sleeping tonight, guys.]
I haven't found any other images besides this one, but the other masks we gained from the monsters makes me believe that this one really is out there, and that someone has a hold of it. Or rather, that the mask has a hold of THEM.
If you're a student and you see it, let a security team member know; Do NOT confront them on your own. We don't really know what they're capable of, but considering the recent minor reconfiguration of the cosmos, I'd put money on "a lot."
We need to find this thing, and whoever it's wearing, and put a stop to them.
So. Moon's dropping, eh? Guess either this dimension's version of Arlon is drunk at the wheel, or something else is going on! Either way, it's some pretty bad news!
Fortunately for you mortals, if none of these other plans pan out, the Sun God PYRRHON has got one of his own! It wouldn't be the first time Pyrrhon's pushed a massive deadly object away from the Earth, after all!
[It'd just be the first time he's done it willingly.]
Only problem is, uh. The Moon is quite a bit bigger than the last one Pyrrhon pushed. And is being affected by gravity instead of free in space. And pushing that last thing left me so drained that I was drifting through space for over a year.
So Pyrrhon's looking for a little help! Anyone that's got the power or propulsion to take some of the load off my back, you know? Anyone here capable of that? Every little bit might count!
I know that most of you chumps are worried about the moon crashing into the planet or whatever.
I've destroyed more than one moon in my time. Several moons. Lots of them. They fall apart like brittle china when I hit them with my massive upper-body strength. I'm just that sort of guy
Problem being, at the time, I was bigger than I currently am. It's a long story, I created my own universe, it was amazing, then I got tired of it and I left because once you've created one universe, you've created them all. But anyway, I don't have access to any Grand Stars, since I can't seem to fly off-planet anymore, so I can't create or destroy planets anymore.
But fear not, much weaker-than-me reader. I, with my brilliant mind, have another plan. I need at least two adventurous... adventurers... to shrink down to microscopic size, enter my body, and visit my... growth area
, which will stimulate my already prodigious strength and amazing body to the limit, and I'll grow large enough to punch the moon out of the sky, no problems. Just imagine, how grateful everyone you know will be, knowing that you got to help me
solve all of your moon-issues for you.
So anyway, I'm taking volunteers here.
[He'd been looking for days. And with all the craziness going on around campus, he knew there was every possibility that she had been caught up in something. Maybe by some giant monster, provoked by the idiots around here. Or someone used the opportunity to do something to her. Either way, he wanted answers. And he went about it in his usual calm, collected way.]
WHERE IS VIVIAN?!
Hey so, things've been gettin' kinda weird, yeah?
Well I know I ain't been talkin' much about it but that don't mean I don't know it. Everyone's been doin' their own things, gettin' investigations together and all.
Someone said somethin' 'bout the water risin'? Obviously we got earthquakes and stuff but the janitor guy said somethin' 'bout gettin' a boat for the ocean?
I dunno what that's all about but I kinda offered to help pay the thing, he seemed pretty serious 'bout it. Helpin' 'im with whatever else too.
I just wanna help, that's all. Dunno what much else I can do but...gosh.
Guys, you will NOT believe what happened to me! I don't know if anyone noticed, but I've been gone for MONTHS! MONTHS! And guess where I was all this time?
Jail. That's right. I went to jail. It turns out I never repaid the debt I racked up on my credit card since the first time I saved Angel Land and bought stuff off the black market, and the debt collectors who I didn't even know were hounding me finally nabbed me after all these years. Three decades and high interest rates did me in so bad... There were so many zeroes tacked onto that amount that I couldn't count them! Wonderful, incredible, amazing, benevolent, wise and all-the-other-good-adjectives-I-can't-think-of-right-now Lady Palutena was gracious enough to bail me out, but I'm still not a free angel yet. The debt's not completely repaid, so I have to keep shelling hearts out until I'm in the clear. That said, uhh... Does anyone know how I can get that kind of cash fast enough?
Auuugh! And now my credit score is in the pits, too! I'll never be able to buy a house, or a car, or a high-def flat-screen TV even if I wanted to! I might as well resign myself to a life of eternal bumhood...
Uh. Long story short, I'm back. I didn't miss too much, did I?
- Tags:bulba/venusaur (pokemon), eikichi mishina (persona), green oak (pokemon), jolt/jolteon (pokemon), knuckles (sonic), kumatora (mother), mona (wario ware), pit (kid icarus), pyrrhon (kid icarus), riwane/charizard (pokemon), sonny moe/snorlax (pokemon), vianca/winged pikmin (pikmin), vinnie/venusaur (pokemon)
Hello? Yes, yes, hello! ... Helloooo?
[ What time first spent in the video, about a minute short of two, was nothing but blackness with a hint of gold. With his crowing greetings and mumbling intelligible curiosity, the feed was relatively droll... until he finally removed the sticky note in front of the webcam. So, that's where the pesky little lens was! Silly him. ]
Hah! Here it is! Hello! [ The jolly man — silver-haired and gas masked — waved for the camera. It was hard to tell if he was physically smiling, but through his voice alone, it was kind of obvious. ] I was told that introducing myself would be a good idea on my pamphlet, so here I am! Ah, but where do I start? [ Humming, he swung his head this way and that, pondering his curious situation. ]
Weeell, my name is Clear! That is my name. [ He pointed to his face, his... masked... face. ] I am here to learn and to keep the school grounds nice~ and~ tidy~! [ With each enunciated word, his head swung side-to-side. ]
I would like to present an offering, and I heard that people here seem to enjoy oranges! [ It seemed Crazy Hand was certainly... giving this hapless kid the run-through. ] Therefore, I purchased many of them. I live in... ah... [ He scurried off-screen briefly before hurrying back, not having broken a single sweat. ] I live in the electrical storage! Please come and pick up your oranges! I would very much only like to give one per person, please!
[ With a quick bow did he start shuffling through his pockets, only to produce... a single orange. Then, he brought out another one. And another. And another. Quickly, that single orange became a huge pile of oranges. How he managed to get all of those, let alone fit them all in his lab coat pockets, was a mystery to behold. With a considerable mountain of oranges, perhaps enough to feed the student body five times over, he extended his hands toward the mighty citrus ascent with pride. ]
[Oh look, it's angel face over there on your screen. Whatever he's about to say, he seems pretty intent on saying it. Must be pretty important.]
So, I think it's pretty safe to say everyone here knows about that floating island that's been looming over our heads for a while. I know you're probably sick of hearing about it or even looking at it, but this is kind of a big deal. Me and Pyrrhon did a bit of exploring up there to see what we could find, and guess what? We found the secret to closing the rift where all the shadow bugs and stuff are coming from!
There was this document inside an evil lab in the mountain with a bunch of notes on it. It's a shame we didn't have time to look through them all, since... the lab blew up before we could do some serious reading. And a lot of the data was corrupted. But the most important thing we learned was that in order to close the rift, you need an explosion with an equal mag... magma... magnetude... to do it! And since this school blows up on a regular basis, I'm pretty sure we have more than enough bomb power combined to blow that rift right back to the dimension it belongs.
...Unfortunately, we still don't know where that rift is. So even if we had an explosion that big, where would we even put it? Anyone have any good leads yet? Let's talk about this!
So this is Smash Academy, huh...
[The tablet is already transmitting, but it seems that it's being held upside-down by someone looking out over the campus green... from about twenty feet above it, on top of the fountain, to be exact.]
Pretty cool. A guy could get used to campus life here!
[Okay, NOW the view lurches and rights itself as its owner lifts it to talk, and the grinning fuzzy face of a cobalt-blue hedgehog fills the screen.]
Hey guys! The name's Sonic; Sonic the Hedgehog! And it looks like I'm a student here now! Cool to meet you guys! Oh hey, if there's a... [he rustles a wad of disorganized papers, looking them over.] Marie, watchin' this? Guess what? I'm your new roommate!
[So Sonic eventually found the paper with his room number in the wad of forms and pamphlets he'd received, and after an afternoon of zipping around campus eventually made it up to BE-15 to meet his new roommate.]
Knock knock! [Knock knock.]
[An excited Mac goes up on the screen, but really, he's chipper a lot so how does this surprise anyone?]
Alright guys, now that the new school year's started, that means we can really get to work in the boxin' club!
I know this past summer's been rough...real rough, but it looks like things' kinda evened out so while we get back into the old grind, it's time I opened up the club for new membership!
New year means some new faces, and I'm sure ya'll got a lotta homework. Heck, I do. But you need the stress relief and get that heart pumpin'!
I've been tryin' to rack in some stuff we could do later in the year, so it oughta been fun.
[HELLO, it is Ike. Long time no see.]
Well, I'm back. I know I've never been much good at keeping up with the network, but I figured I'd make a post to say so. I haven't been gone for long, but it still feels like it's been a while. It's been... Two months, more or less. But now that I'm back...
[Ike's not as keyed up as when he arrived the first time. He's calm, if not a tad exhausted. After that, a new emotion worms its way onto his face, one of mild irritation. He sighs.]
The headmasters re-enrolled me as a senior again. To be honest, the past year feels like a dream to me somehow. ...That doesn't make much sense, does it? You all saw me graduate, right? I don't know what went wrong with the headmasters, but there was no getting through to them. It's like they couldn't remember it at all. So this is where I'm at.
It's... not so bad. I came to terms with a few things that have been bothering me when I went back home. Now, I feel like I can focus on what I'm doing while I'm here much better than before.
[He cuts narrating his thoughts short by dragging his eyes back to the lens of the camera quite deliberately, then focusing back on his computer screen.]
...Right. Anyway, I'm back, and I'm ready to start the year. Again. That's all I really have to say. [Time to... shut this off. Yeah.]
[There's a scruffy young man on the screen. I mean his hair is washed, and everything, which is just... like, super amazing... wow. Hot water. You guys have it good. What was I saying? Right, scruffy. Cleaned up some, sure, but still in shabby clothes and generally haggard, weary in a way that makes him look way older than he is. He looks sort of familiar, if you squint
He looks pretty goddamn serious, or is certainly giving his best effort to be, but he keeps getting halfway there and getting lost, overwhelmed. God, he wants this to work, but he has no clue how to make it happen. He just wants to help, somehow, please.
My name is Hajime Tanaka. You... may have known me. Know... still know me. A past... me. [time travel is the worst why
Most of you have surely noticed, by now, the strange occurrences affecting your friends, or perhaps yourselves. I am certain many of you are worried and confused by the matter, but it is important for you to understand: no matter how much duress they may cause you, these effects are little more than a distraction from something much greater and more terrible to come.
The warped sky you've seen in the last month, the shadow insects and the monsters they make--they're the first signs of a terrible calamity yet to come. This school rests atop a dimensional boundary, and it is ready to split and unleash untold chaos upon Final Destination City. I come from the future, to... wow, that... sounds so silly out loud
--I have come
from the future
where it has already happened, and it's... it's... been a bad time. I don't... I'd rather you not have to deal with it, is the thing.
I understand that many groups have already gone to investigate and inspect the catacombs beneath the school. Any who are willing and able, I implore you to keep looking, to try and locate the rift and put an end to this invasion before the world can end.
Those of you who can't or won't look for whatever reason, be warned and be ready in case of whatever may occur. Prepare and store whatever you can--food, weapons, clothes, whatever amenities you can. Locate safe places to hide, or--
[Wait. Wait this is either going to instill panic, or make him look like a nut. Deep breaths. Okay.
The... the most important thing to me is that people are ready.
We were taken by surprise last time. I cannot possibly emphasize how little I want that to happen to you all again.((replies from firegonedire))
[It was an ordinary day for Jolt. Just an ordinary day, as far as he was concerned. Thank goodness he hadn't been affected by the craziness going around. But just to be sure, he'd better go check on his family and friends.]
Hey, everyone. Is anything weird going on for anyone? I'm fine, but I'll be there to help if anyone's having any problems themselves. We've gotta stick together, right?
[Only instead of the usual perky spiky dog on the webcam, it was a more calm looking guy with pale green hair and a shock of dark green cowlick. And his ears kinda looked like leaves.
Also Riwane might have noticed a small bouquet outside her door. Where did that come from? It's a mystery to everyone.]
[Late, late at night Friday evening (or early Saturday morning if you prefer) something broke through the summer sky. It wasn't one of those strange purple streaks but it was coming in hot and fast. A fireball looked like it was heading on a crash course for the dorms but banked hard at the last moment and plowed through the nearby forest bordering the school. The result was loud and thunderous, and left an ominous billow of smoke somewhere deep beyond the tree line. Perhaps it was a [VIDEO]
metroidrite meteorite? Dare ye investigate?
Should you bravely venture into the poorly lit forest you might discover what looks like the smoldering remains of a crashed spaceship. Half the hull was buried deep into the ground jutting out at a 45 degree angle, heaping up dirt and rock where it impacted. A neat line of toppled over, half-mangled, half-burned trees points in the direction it came from--seemingly none other than "up".
Samus was surprised he survived that at all. He can thank his suit of armor for absorbing most of the impact but now it too is mangled beyond any good use. Stripped of his Power Suit he's nearly defenseless, not to mention sore and grumpy. All he has is a rather useless emergency pistol and his tattered skin-tight Zero Suit. Attempting to crawl out of the wreckage only so armed may have been foolish, but he had no choice.
Some distress signal that turned out to be. At least he was alive, and he planned on making that much count.]
[SOME TIME AFTER THE CRASH... (perhaps a day or two later) Samus attempts, very begrudgingly, to get settled in this Smash Academy place until he can make repairs on his poor broken ship. Not that anyone needs to know about that and frankly he'd prefer no one did. That's a problem he plans to tackle on his own but in the meantime he has another one. [[OOC NOTE #1: Lady Samus definitely would have at least told Ian she was jetting off to space with Falcon for an indefinite period of time. SORRY IAN, YOU'RE THE MAN OF THE HOUSE.
On the video there's some blonde grumpy guy
I am shit designing clothes just roll with it he could be blonde Han Solo apparently using one of the library's public computers.]
My name is Samus Aran. I'm not one for formalities—you can call me Samus, or Aran, whatever you prefer. I'm new faculty and as much as I'd love to get settled in [There's some very light sarcasm there to the trained ear.] I'm running into a problem.
[He holds up a set of keys, upon which are inscribed with the letters: TD-01.]
The Headmasters insist this is my new designated room to board in, but it's already obviously occupied. I'd prefer not to kick anyone out of their room or take it by force unnecessarily, so show yourself so we can negotiate.
OOC NOTE #2: Because of this exchange, Lady Samus, before leaving, would have made efforts to encase some bombs in ice with her pew pew arm cannon's ice beams and booby-trap the hell out of the bunkers. More heavily (and more deadly-ly!) the areas surrounding the bombs, and should this put a damper on any plans I'm super flexible and willing to roll with anything; she missed a bomb, made human error, setting off one of her traps exposes a bomb or something. She definitely would have gone through the efforts to not make it easy on anyone, that's all.]]
[All of a sudden, anyone who happened to be outside, would suddenly see what seems to be a gigantic man made out of fire, towering over the school, as Pyrrhon uses his godly powers to project an image of himself into the sky.]
GREETINGS, MORTALS! This is just a quick little message, letting you all know that you are now in the presence of a God. Pyrrhon, the Sun God and eternal warrior of justice, has decided to take a little break from his godly duties, and visit one of your lowly mortal schools to get his learning on!
That's all for now, folks! If you've got any questions, or just wanna offer some worship and talk about how awesome Pyrrhon is, go ahead and hit me up on the school's network.
[And just like that, the image of Pyrrhon fades away.]
[A possibly familiar face comes on screen, just a cheerful and giving a quick wave before she settles onto the chair.]
Howdy! If ya'll can tell by the look of the room behind me, eyup! You figured rite, Ah'm back! Ah gotta say Ah missed ya guys and Ah'm glad to be 'round again.
How's everyone been? Everyone okay? Ah left sum goodies from tha farm in the cafeteria, feel free ta help yerselves! Anyways, gunna settle in and unpack!
[When the video comes on, Ema looks rather... intense, glasses pulled down, staring at the camera seriously.]
I'm here to talk to you guys about something very serious: science club!
I haven't been able to find out about one already established, but if it exists, I don't want to step on any toes, so you guys should contact me! But if there's not one, I'm here to make one!
[And now she looks less intense and more cocky.]
I've talked to a lot of people at this school who love science, like me! There's got to be enough of us to start a club. Any kind of science is welcome! Chemistry, physics, astrology... [Astrology isn't a science, Ema.]
If you're interested in science, you should join! I'm working on finding us a club room, and I've been looking on the internet for experiments and stuff we can do! It'll be fun! First meeting Friday at four PM. See you there!
[She starts to turn off the video, and then something important occurs to her.]
Oh right, I'm Ema Skye, scientific investigator! Nice to meet you!
[And now she turns the video off.]
- Tags:atlas (portal), chihiro fujisaki (dangan ronpa), cyrus (pokemon), eikichi mishina (persona), ema skye (ace attorney), gordon freeman (half-life), kiyotaka ishimaru (dangan ronpa), lucca ashtear (chrono trigger), makoto naegi (dangan ronpa), pit (kid icarus), sonny moe/snorlax (pokemon), wheatley (portal)
Alright, everyone! There has been a lot of talk about statues beneath the school and this recent infestation, so listen to this! I believe the two are connected!
After that small earthquake the other week, Hajime Tanaka and I both fell into underground caverns, and we saw those same strange bugs bring a statue to life! It attacked us, but we made it out in one piece! But now the bugs are up here... they seem harmless on their own, but don't let your guard down!
There you have it. Is that information useful to anybody at all?
[Useful for making it clear who pissed the bugs off enough for them to come to the surface, maybe.]
- Tags:general guy (mario), gordon freeman (half-life), hajime tanaka (osu tatakae ouendan), kei nanjo (persona), kiyotaka ishimaru (dangan ronpa), pit (kid icarus), pulseman (pulseman), sasha/charizard (pokemon), ulki (fire emblem), vivian/turret (portal), zelda (zelda; ocarina of time)