So... I guess I'm getting married! Suck on THAT, Bowser! As soon as this is all sorted, you'd better believe it!
There's a lot that needs to be done, I suppose...
[Private to Kumatora]
So I was wondering... I kinda need a maid of honor. You want the job?
[Private to Mac]
When we can get out of here again, I, um... I want to go back to Sarasaland. And I want to bring you with me... After all, this is officially a royal wedding now!
So. Moon's dropping, eh? Guess either this dimension's version of Arlon is drunk at the wheel, or something else is going on! Either way, it's some pretty bad news!
Fortunately for you mortals, if none of these other plans pan out, the Sun God PYRRHON has got one of his own! It wouldn't be the first time Pyrrhon's pushed a massive deadly object away from the Earth, after all!
[It'd just be the first time he's done it willingly.]
Only problem is, uh. The Moon is quite a bit bigger than the last one Pyrrhon pushed. And is being affected by gravity instead of free in space. And pushing that last thing left me so drained that I was drifting through space for over a year.
So Pyrrhon's looking for a little help! Anyone that's got the power or propulsion to take some of the load off my back, you know? Anyone here capable of that? Every little bit might count!
I have salvaged as many of the ancient and important books from the library as I am able. That said, those efforts are fruitless should the moon conclude its path.
There is one option that will save us, yet for that I require all of you. You have varied experience with artifacts of great power, and we must pool that knowledge and artifacts themselves, as well as find those able to use them.
Additionally, among our alumni there was a being known as Bob Heather, called Arceus by whose who view it as a deity. Finding Arceus once more would be a boon to our cause.
And Mesprit, to you...call your siblings forth. The three of you hold a power capable of putting a stop to this.
We must take what we need. Truly, we are utterly alone in this world. What remains depends on those here.
Guys, you will NOT believe what happened to me! I don't know if anyone noticed, but I've been gone for MONTHS! MONTHS! And guess where I was all this time?
Jail. That's right. I went to jail. It turns out I never repaid the debt I racked up on my credit card since the first time I saved Angel Land and bought stuff off the black market, and the debt collectors who I didn't even know were hounding me finally nabbed me after all these years. Three decades and high interest rates did me in so bad... There were so many zeroes tacked onto that amount that I couldn't count them! Wonderful, incredible, amazing, benevolent, wise and all-the-other-good-adjectives-I-can't-think-of-right-now Lady Palutena was gracious enough to bail me out, but I'm still not a free angel yet. The debt's not completely repaid, so I have to keep shelling hearts out until I'm in the clear. That said, uhh... Does anyone know how I can get that kind of cash fast enough?
Auuugh! And now my credit score is in the pits, too! I'll never be able to buy a house, or a car, or a high-def flat-screen TV even if I wanted to! I might as well resign myself to a life of eternal bumhood...
Uh. Long story short, I'm back. I didn't miss too much, did I?
- Tags:bulba/venusaur (pokemon), eikichi mishina (persona), green oak (pokemon), jolt/jolteon (pokemon), knuckles (sonic), kumatora (mother), mona (wario ware), pit (kid icarus), pyrrhon (kid icarus), riwane/charizard (pokemon), sonny moe/snorlax (pokemon), vianca/winged pikmin (pikmin), vinnie/venusaur (pokemon)
[Green had gone into town with the express purpose of buying gifts for his graduated Pokemon, but then immediately felt guilty and bought gifts for all his Pokemon. They all ended up getting new (color coded, of course) messenger bags for the journeys ahead. He also agonized for a bit longer over a gift for another graduate, Blue. She got a necklace with a stone embedded in it that reminded him of the stones she had gifted him when she came to visit, before she had even enrolled. That, along with a note--
What's a thing you still haven't done, despite having lived in FDC for so long? Let's go do it this week.
I trust you'll choose something adventurous. Of course, I have suggestions, if you'd like.
Congrats to all you sorry douches that graduated this year-- Personally, it seems ridiculous that so many of you are choosing to stick around, but look who's talking. I hope you'll join me in making next year as horrifying as possible for any incoming freshmen.
Private, to Bulba and Kumatora
Since Zelda went home, looks like it's up to you now, Bulba. gonna have to make sure me and Kuma don't party too goddamn hard on any given night.
I will volunteer to attempt to make a batch of cookies in her honor. I'll never be able to get them as good as her, though.
My sweet academy!
[Voile is bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.]
Do you know what we're missing that we haven't had in quite some time? And I understand that is mostly my doing, however, I'm going to make up for that. The last contest hall and host club gathering was a success. We should have another one, and I've already begun work for a springtime celebration for the end of this month.
So what do I need? [Not eggnog.]
Volunteers. And believe me, I'll pay you handsomely. In food. Money, I guess if you need it or want it. Tailored clothes? Sure.
While not necessarily in need of a full committee, I'm interested in ideas for decorations and outfits. Although I'm very tempted to make flower themed outfits for everyone. I assure you, I could make flowers manly, too.
But if you're interested in lending a hand, whether helping me prepare, or playing the part of a host, you should say something here. There will be prizes and other such things, so it might be a good way to calm down after Valentine's Day. There's plenty of time to get involved and no rush. I promise.
Not only is the weather horrific, Valentine's Day is approaching. Considering last year was an unmitigated disaster, I'm giving the residents of this campus fair warning that I will not be stopping for conversation with ANYONE on this day. I'm planning to avoid eye contact at all costs, and in fact, I might wear dark sunglasses. The holiday already sucks as it is, but last year I did things I shudder to think of under the influence of some dastardly force.
And thus, I won't be speaking to any of you. Honestly, it's great to get an excuse. It'll be a nice vacation from all the mindless drivel that spills out of the heads of certain people, human and non-human, dead or alive.
alright kiddlies time for some ra announcement shit
it is now officially autumn and i know the thing to do as the nights get colder is add a little warming bev into your apple cider if you know what i mean. if youre gonna be drunk there are some ground rules
- do not throw up in a common area
- do not blast music/scream and stuff
- do not allow any assorted magical powers to go haywire/involve the campus in some weeklong inconvenient shenanigans
as always this is green oak, at least the third or fourth best ra, signing off
[An excited Mac goes up on the screen, but really, he's chipper a lot so how does this surprise anyone?]
Alright guys, now that the new school year's started, that means we can really get to work in the boxin' club!
I know this past summer's been rough...real rough, but it looks like things' kinda evened out so while we get back into the old grind, it's time I opened up the club for new membership!
New year means some new faces, and I'm sure ya'll got a lotta homework. Heck, I do. But you need the stress relief and get that heart pumpin'!
I've been tryin' to rack in some stuff we could do later in the year, so it oughta been fun.
[The screen pops on, showing a kid who looks very...familiar. Those who were at the hot springs may remember him as Helio, though his actions and manner would come off as familiar to those who weren't there]
...This form again. Why has this happened...I must study these processes.
[He seems to be talking to himself, not noticing the camera. Or maybe he does; it's hard to tell.]
This is an abnormality.
[Galleom. Purple streaks in the sky, or barely-there bubbles. Shadow Bugs. Invisible walls in space her ship couldn't pass through. These recent occurrences bothered Samus, of course, but she could always take solace in being able to jet off into space should she need additional supplies or some well-needed isolation. She still had her freedom.
Now, suddenly, she didn't. And that bothered her. It made her kind of angry. And an angry Samus was prone to be a productive Samus.]No doubt you've all noticed to some degree the purple streaks coming and going in the sky, the influx of shadow bugs, and that uninvited prom guest with the ugly face.
...The... apparent gender-switch one of you is experiencing.
We all know this academy is no stranger to strange things but this instance seems like a cultivation of strange things. They don't seem to be lasting a nice clean predictable week like they usually do. I'm not going to wait around for the Hands to admit all they know how to be is utterly useless. We should take matters into our own hands.
I've taken the liberty of exploring the bunkers, and yes there is an unsettling collection of life-size statues down there as some of you have ascertained. For as long as I've been here, I can tell you most of them are ones I recognize... they're former Smash Academy residents.
The shadow bugs seemed to be pouring out of one statue in particular but I could not get close enough. Tempting as it was to destroy it... I didn't.
I also discovered a room that--as succinctly as I can describe it--reminded me of a Biotech Research Area, or Biohazard Containment area. There was also a chamber filled with what looked like large defunct bombs.
I would appreciate it if anyone has any other pertinent information to share, or things they've discovered.
[Joel is on screen, looking about as happy as he ever does. But there seems to be a few black smears on his face, like soot.]
Lotta folks havin' troubles with these little bugs it seems like.
Not that I'm encouraging you kids to burn the place down? But they go up real good.
I got a flamethrower I can bring around to help out if anyone's got it really bad. But if you've got a lighter and a can of hairspray, that'd work just as well.
[Weaponry you can make in the comfort of your own home!]
Just make sure to have a fire extinguisher on hand.
...and be careful.
As I'm sure many of you are aware by now, a bath house has opened for school use. I hope you all will take this opportunity to soak and relax to ease your stress before finals begin.
However, the bath has no separation between the genders. This may not be a problem for all, but I'm sure it will be for some. Thusly, I have drafted a suggestion for a schedule.
Naturally, I've no authority to make this schedule official, but I hope all can agree that the proposition is fair, and an attempt to make our peers feel satisfied and safe.
If you've any suggestions, questions, or objections, I welcome them. The more people that pitch in their thoughts, the faster we can come to a satisfying decisions that suits everyone's needs!
Good evening, students! [Or staff, if they're listening.
] How is everybody settling in to the new semester? The days may be cold and short and often bleak, but it's important to start as strong as you finish! That's why I have decided that everybody could benefit from a little motivation.
Here is a little activity for us all to share! Everyone, share a quote or proverb that truly inspires you! Use it to invoke that same passion in others! Together, we'll pull through the dark of winter and emerge victorious into the light of spring! Yes, this is truly a wonderful idea!
[Oh god there's no way he's serious about something this lame. But if you squint, you can see one of his handwritten motivational posters on the wall behind him, which means he is probably dead serious.
All right, I'll begin! Let's see... An appropriate one for this situation would be...
"Fall down seven times, stand up eight."
It means, of course, that no matter what life has to throw at you to knock you down, as long as you do not give in to defeat, you can always get back up and try again! Prove that you are greater than any hardship! At the very end of it all, remain standing strong and proud!
What do you think? Does it spark a little inspiration? Now it's your turn!
Of course he won't be feeling so passionate when a SPECIAL GUEST STAR makes an appearance later on... Stay tuned. Or don't. HOLD ON I LIED that'll be somewhere else.
( Char received one (1) text message to his cellular device. )
[And then eventually, after dargon business went down, a series of other private network text posts were made from both of Bulba's and Vinnie's accounts. Wow. Gosh.]( Private to Nyx and Jolt, from Bulba: )
---( Private to Red Team, from Vinnie: )
---( Private to Voile and Max from Both of Them.. )
---( ALSO THERE IS A NOTE FOR SKULL KID, FROM VINNIE: )
---( ALSO THERE IS A NOTE FOR ZELDA AND KUMATORA FROM BULBA: )
[HELLO You can jump straight into action threads if you want to handwave setting things up. We can assume they planned to meet [SOMEWHERE!] at [SOMETIME!]. If you would also like to just text reply or handwave things, that is also super cool :>]
- Tags:!action post, bulba/venusaur (pokemon), jolt/jolteon (pokemon), kerosene/charizard (pokemon), kumatora (mother), marie/wartortle (pokemon), max (advance wars), nyx/gengar (pokemon), sasha/charizard (pokemon), skull kid (zelda), sonny moe/snorlax (pokemon), vinnie/venusaur (pokemon), voile/gardevoir (pokemon), zelda (zelda; ocarina of time)